This Would Be Funny Except That...

It Hurts So Much!

It is becoming painfully obvious that, as I suggested in a previous post, there is a double standard in place which forces the hard-working citizens of this country to pay their taxes so that the wealthy scofflaws and indiscreet bureaucrats don't have to pay theirs.  Wall street tycoons can continue to get their high salaries and huge bonuses, and live high on the hog, by being carried on the backs of those of us with no connections and no special privileges.  

We simple folk, however, are not entirely left out.  We have been granted the privilege of paying exorbitant taxes to support the folly of banks and bankers so that they can receive a get-out-of-jail free card.  Doesn't that awareness just give you goosebumps?

Those miscreants are responsible for burying the world's economy through unethical and downright illegal practices, and are rewarded by bailouts and winks from their cohorts in Washington.  They know that the poor, powerless proletariat have no choice but to ante up.

Need Proof?

Kathleen Sebelius, Obama's pick for Secretary of Health is the latest example of this inequity.  She joins three other Obama nominees in a hall of shame for failure to pay income taxes.  This is becoming de rigeur and almost seems to be a prerequisite for entry into the federal government (a.k.a. The Washington Country Club).  

I thought that this type of thing was only found in street gangs.  Just as a young gang prospect has to  perform flagrant and incorrigible acts of violence to prove he is worthy of gang membership, perhaps there is a similar rite of passage for Washington insiders.  Only after having proven arrogant contempt for the laws of the land is one allowed to join the gang and enter the club.

For years I suspected that the game of Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness was rigged in favor of the wealthy so that they could remain wealthy, and the middle class could remain faithfully committed to supporting their wealth.  That proposition is no longer just a suspicion.  It is quickly becoming a published protocol.

Out of Hardship is Born Opportunity!

All of this leads me to the idea that there might be an opportunity lurking here.  A couple of opportunities, actually.

First I would like to propose a simple way to eliminate the Federal budget deficit.  I believe that if the IRS were to audit all of the members of federal, state, and local governments, as well as all of the officers and board members of banks and Wall Street firms, they would uncover a windfall!  This would surely provide a sum of hidden monies substantial enough to pay off the deficit.

Save Your Applause, There's More!

Secondly, I see the opportunity for we simple folk to join the game.  If we all start cheating on our taxes, the magnitude of this peaceful demonstration would overwhelm the ability of the IRS to keep score.  That would surely help to establish a de facto egalitarian society.  We are, in fact, obligated to do this.  It is our patriotic duty to demonstrate our support for Washington and Wall Street by emulating their recommended best practices!  Rather than vote the bums out, we should all become bums!  Group hug anyone?

But Wait!  There's More!

It has been rumored that Timothy Geithner, who cheated on his taxes to the tune of $50,000.00, also was granted immunity from penalties and interest on those back-taxes.  This, if true, is a great precedent!  For those of you who try my second opportunity above, if you get caught, you, too, will have to be granted immunity from penalties and interest!  All you have to do is claim the Geithner Defense (a.k.a. the "What's good for the goose" defense).

Ok, now you can applaud!

Thank you, thank you.

The entire essence of America is the hope to first make money -- then make money with money -- then make lots of money with lots of money. -- Paul Erdman